Things I Love...

...cupcakes...

...happy socks...

...greenhouses...

...tree houses...

...castle rubble...

...book shelves...

...trunks...

...and geary clocks...

Carnevale di Venezia...

...I'll just put this on my To-Do List...

Lost in the Dangling Conversations...

Walking. Talking. Not realizing how far you've gone. Losing track of time.

Next to counting the stars, this is my next favorite thing to do. To walk with someone and talk about the most ridiculous things is more than words. Not only are you exercising but you're also having fun! [infomercial?] To get to know someone on a one-on-one level is superior. You're alone with them, no one else to distract. Everyone is different, for the most part, when there's no one else around. You get to know them on a more personal level.

For me, I love to ask the... different questions: What's your favorite color, if you were an animal which would you be, which of the original Power Rangers are you, favorite Greek god(dess), which time period do you want to live it, pick a super power, which Hogwarts house are you in?? You get the idea. I love doing this so much. I always loose the sense of where I am and what time it is, kind of like when I was with Rosie in Tim Horton's, if the best. Getting lost in the depth of the conversation to the point where you look at your cell phone (because honestly, who has a watch anymore?) see the time and say, "No it can't be that late!" What a stimulating moment.

I only go on walks like that with people I feel comfortable with and I tend to let me guard down and talk about things I wouldn't talk about in a group setting or in the daytime. Having that personal feeling with someone does something to the cement that holds my wall up; it's loosened. I feel that happens to the other person too. It's nice to let someone know something sort of secret about you. To confide that one feeling with someone lightens your load just that much more.

But the fun really starts after 2 am. Something happens then where conversations take a turn to the cerebral. You contemplate theories, philosophies, religion, existence, science, things like... what if everyone sees "different colors" but because they grew up with it they see no difference. Like my red is someone else's purple but because we grew up with that you can't tell. I really hope you got that. You talk about the future, the past, what's in store for you. You talk about the ifs of life. Maybe you think back and say "What if I did this..." "What if I was born in a different month..." Oh the ifs! Those are the craziest things in life. But you have to talk about that with someone late at night on a walk, or laying in a field, on someone's back portch, driving... anywhere.

Every person has a different insight to things. Listen to what they have to say, it might be important.

A Cashier's Dream...

Today at work something amazing happened. A woman's total was $63. 59 and paid with two $50's. The change was $36.41. To a regular person that is just another number. But to me, a cashier, it's so much more. giving something $36.41 back as change means you give them one of everything that the drawer can hold. You give them back one 20, 10, 5, 1 and 25¢, 10¢, 5¢ and 1¢. How glorious! It was the first time that happened to me in my almost four years of being a cashier.

I just though you'd like to know that.

Vision Blurred...

"This Brutal House"

Paintings

A Rose and Her Sunshine...

I'm growing up so fast I've almost forgotten all of my adventures when I was younger. I've always wanted to be Peter Pan, to always be a little boy and have fun. However, life is an overcasting shadow always right behind you, forever growing closer. No matter how young you try to be, you are always dragged toward adulthood.

When you graduate high school, every group of friends think that they'll always stay in contact, always be together. Sure, it works out for the first year, but after that, for the most part, people grow apart, fall out of contact and that's that. However, there are some people who refuse to let you go, who can't live without you, who need to have you in their life, and those are your true friends.

From what I've found, these friends come to you, mostly, through serendipitous ways (or at least for me that is).

I would like to, if I may (seeing as this is my blog, I may), talk about one of my friends who has greatly influenced my life and who I've become today. She has supported me in everything I've done, aided me in my creative thought, helped me see the beautiful things in the world, has helped me see life in a different way, helped me see the positive side, has journeyed with me on many adventures, and I hope I have done the same for Rosie.

Sadly I cannot remember the first day we met, but will tell you the event when I realized we were to be significant figures in each other's lives...

Here's some information about me and Rosie: We have the same birthday, we were born in the same hospital just a few hours from each other (Rosie is older), so that means as new borns we were in the same nursery in the hospital. Something must have happened in that small room. If memory serves me properly, I think I found out this information when my mom showed me the baby announcement in the paper and I saw Rosie's name.

Now if you didn't think that was epic, hold onto your chairs. The two of us were filling out college applications one afternoon at her house when we both had to supply our Social Security Number. Rosie didn't know her's by heart so she had to find it. I, on the other hand, knew it by heart. I quickly recited my number and after Rosie found her number she read her's aloud. We both had a shocked and ecstatic look on our faces. Our Social Security Numbers are right after each other. -What?!- Yeah I know!

Referring back to my first sentence, while growing up it's hard to remember all of the happy moments in your life with certain people when you aren't with them. Rosie and I go to two different colleges far away from each other so we aren't together anymore. It sucks. Being here in New York I've grown up so much. I've been so career-focused and future-minded I haven't taken the time to look back to the past. It's very important to remember the happy moments in your life, it will help you feel happy today.

When I think of her I think of the conversations we would have together. I can't even really remember any conversation specifically but just the feeling of bliss and freedom I was experiencing is something I haven't felt with anyone else. I've tried to have conversations with people but Rosie is the only person who I can have a "ridiculous" conversation and have something magical come of it. Talking with her makes time stop, or at least make it seem like it has. One night we went to Time Horton's and talked and philosophized and imagined until we wondered what the time was. It was 3am. "No, it can't be" was the popular phrase that moment. We then proceeded to go to her house, laid on her porch with a pillow and blanket staring at the stars continuing our theories about life and the universe. We talked through the sunrise until we decided that it was best for us to finally go to bed.

Our conversations have always stayed optimistic. We seem to feed off each other's positivity.

I can't believe I haven't thought about that night more often, it was amazing. But this is what happens when you grow up. You don't replace these moments but they seem to be pushed aside by the new memories you're creating with your new friends. The new memories are like bullies stuffing these older, weaker memories into a cramped locker in the back of your mind.

Some of my fondest memories with that wonderful girl is in the passenger seat of her truck, Xander, singing songs at the top of our lungs, harmonizing, sometimes not harmonizing, but we didn't care. We were together, laughing.

We took an adventure to Berea, Ohio to see our friend Jesse perform in one of his school shows and what an adventure we had. "Sta- woah," dead batteries, walking in the rain, getting lost on the thruway and singing. I wish I could remember ever minute of it but I can't. I can remember how I felt though. The best. Even though our memory can't retain every small detail of an event we can always uncover that same emotion we felt.

We both see each other as the other's half, twin if you will (and I will). That being said, we are complete opposites. Paraphrasing what Rosie said, I'm the sunlight and she's the moonlight. I blossom in the summer rays and the first snow fall is her ecstasy. And like the most famous opposite, Yin and Yang, we fit perfectly, have a a little bit of "light" or "dark" in the respective side, complement, and balance each other.

-To Rosie-

I will love you forever, with all of my heart, body and soul. Although our time as youth is fleeting, our adulthood can be just as fill with journeys, adventures, love, laughs, song, dance, talks and walks as it has been in the pasts. It's something we shouldn't fear, for fear will destroy us. I'm truly excited about growing up, it's just another grand adventure. It's what we make of it.

Don't worry, the sunbeams will find you, I'll make sure of that.

And Rosie, all of our answers are in the stars and I'll be right next to you, counting them with you.

-Taylor

Post Script: ...I will.

photo

Rape Can Be Beautiful...

The Rape of Proserpina. One of my favorite pieces. It was created by Bernini between 1621-1622. The movement, the facial expressions... yes. But my favorite part of this piece is none of these really, it's Poseidon's hand grasping her thigh.

The fact that Bernini could make Proserpina's thigh look like this...it's beyond words.

The Rape of the Sabine Women by Giambologna. The poses of the figures and the twisting movement that occurs between the three of them is brilliant.